Filmmaker Dave Klaiber's fight to save men from themselves
When they lose hope, most men will withdraw into themselves. Dave Klaiber’s mission is to change that inclination
ONE CONVERSATION CAN CHANGE A MAN’S LIFE. Every minute of every day, one male takes his own life. Suicide is the leading cause of death for Australian men between 15 and 44. Those were just two of the sobering statistics Dave Klaiber threw at me the first time we sat down together.
I’d been introduced to Dave through a mutual friend who thought I might be able to help him with his passion project, one centred on men’s mental health. It’s a subject I’ve long felt an affinity with, having been tapped on the shoulder by the black dog myself years ago. At the time, I can remember my darling mum suggesting it was as easy as “just get up, get dressed and get on with it, David”. Thanks for the advice, Mum. But not that simple.
My most recent encounter with that insidious beast came when it swallowed a dear mate’s brother. I watched an otherwise happy family brought to their collective knees in the blink of an eye. A moment in time that has forever changed their lives. It was devastating enough to witness; I can’t begin to imagine what it felt like for them. All I could do was be there, perhaps offer a shoulder. The truth is, most of us men aren’t much use in tough emotional situations. We don’t deal with it well, let alone talk about it. Stupid, really.
Driving to meet Dave that day at the iconic North Bondi cafe Speedos, I am struck by how good I feel. Sydney, and Bondi in particular, has turned on one of those almost perfect early spring mornings. As I walk to the meeting, chasing the day’s first coffee, it’s a classic “sun’s out, guns out” kind of scene along the beachfront. Perfect sky, perfect water, happy people everywhere.
But you never really know, do you? Happy faces rarely tell the whole story. There’s a lot going on beneath the surface, things you’ll never see from a distance. And that, I think, is exactly why Dave’s work is so important.
We do what men do, shake hands, laugh at the old “at least we won’t forget each other’s names” line, then order flat whites all round. Soon enough, the business of getting to know each other begins. Our mutual friend had pitched his idea only briefly, but it doesn’t take long for Dave’s passion to bubble up. And when it does, it is infectious. I can feel his energy, the urgency of a project that matters deeply to him.
Dave is an alarmingly engaging human. Intelligent, creative, with just a dash of cheekiness about him, the quintessential Aussie larrikin wrapped in a professional exterior. He’s also an open book, willing to share the road he’s walked, the potholes he’s fallen into – and the better place he now finds himself in.
A multi-award-winning filmmaker with more than 25 years of collaborating with brands and other creatives, Dave’s world began to unravel a few years ago. First his marriage, then his business. Soon enough, he found himself in a dark place, a place many of us recognise. Lethargy creeps in. So do the “maybe I’ll open another bottle” or the “thanks for the invite but I can’t make it” habits. The couch starts to swallow you whole, even while you’re trying to convince the world and yourself, “Nothing to see here, all good, no problems”.
“We each have our own relationship with that dirty black dog,” Dave tells me. “But the big thing for blokes is thinking there’s only one way through it, and that’s alone. We’re not equipped to deal with it or talk about it, just not how most blokes are built. Which is ridiculous; we solve work problems every day, just not our own.”
Dave concludes with a laugh and his signature cheeky grin, which I quickly realise is directed at the server, who knows that to mean, another round of coffee, please.
When I ask what got him out of his pit, what worked for him, he doesn’t blink. “A new partner, a subtle suggestion about the benefits of a gym membership, a return to the surf”. And, crucially, starting to talk about his stuff and the realisation that talking helped. As did a good therapist, and focusing on his own wellbeing. “You can’t blame others for where you are. You’ve got to take ownership.”
His position is simple: everyone’s journey out of despair is different, but you can get out. If his creative talent and disarming manner can help other men share their stories and maybe encourage even one bloke to seek help, then that’s good news in a world of worsening statistics.
Dave’s pitch is as compelling as the man himself. Simply put, IT AINT OVER YET will be a docuseries centred on male vulnerability, shared through the power of conversation.
“I want to create a global series that gives men a voice. Raw, honest stories of struggle and resilience across all walks of life,” he says. “By bringing these journeys to the screen, we break the silence so many men live in. We spark connection. We inspire. And we remind partners, families and friends that change is possible. We want men to feel less alone, and to know that even in the darkest times, there is hope and help. We want families to understand the silent battles many men fight and to see that small steps, conversations and support can make a difference. I’m also passionate about the series being accessible. YouTube is my preferred vehicle. It’s easily found, easily shared with mates and perhaps, if you’re uncomfortable, it’s watchable by yourself, maybe on your phone at the beach or in your room. I just want blokes to feel like it’s for them.”
Speedos has since become our regular spot, where Dave and I nut out the next steps, potential participants, sponsors, the long road to bringing this to screens. IT AINT OVER YET is coming together quickly. I would be remiss if I didn’t reach out from these pages to those who may be interested in finding out more about what sponsorship might look like. Feel free to use the contact information at the end of this piece. Sponsorship isn’t just about dollars. It’s about helping shift a culture, about sending a message that men’s mental health is not something to ignore.
Because here’s the kicker: more than 70 per cent of men don’t seek professional help when they’re struggling. One in eight experience depression. One in three, anxiety. Too many suffer in silence. And too many never make it out.
If we can shine a little light, just a crack, that’s worth everything. Every conversation, every story, every small action could be the difference between despair and hope.
And that is why Dave’s project matters, why this conversation matters, and why now, more than ever, we all need to pay attention.
If you’d like to know more or want to get involved, drop Dave a note at itaintoveryet.tv.
If you or someone you know is experiencing distress, thoughts of self-harm or suicidal feelings, you can contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or seek help from your local mental health services.
Styling: Kailee Waller
Hair: Max Serrano
Makeup: Monique Jones
All clothing: COS
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