All 9 Alien films ranked, from horror classics to absolute stinkers
From the dismal 'Alien Vs Predator' attempts to the masterpiece that is 'Prometheus'
IT IS A RARE THING INDEED to find a movie sequel that outstrips the original. Terminator 2, perhaps. The Godfather Part II, probably. The Dark Knight, definitely. But greater sequels are hard to find. Like reheated leftovers, the flavours tend to fade the more times you microwave them. Of course, you can add sauce or toss in some spice. But in the end, sequels hardly ever taste as fresh the second time around, let alone the ninth.
That’s how many Alien movies there are. Nine. Nine times it has been reheated, spiced, sauced, mixed with other leftovers, and boiled down into broth. Even now, 46 years after Ridley Scott gave us the world’s most cinematically evil monster, we’re still picking at its bones, searching for new ways to consume it.
But with the hotly reviewed Alien: Earth now on Disney+ this week, which Alien movies are still a feast, and which would be better scraped off for the dog?
It’s important to note, obviously, that taste is taste – one man’s juicy burger is another man’s murdered cow. And it is with that in mind that we revisit the Alien saga.
9. Alien vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)
Three-day-old trifle mixed with last night’s beans on toast. A hash of a rehash that made Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice feel like a Fellini. It should never have been made. It’s too dark most of the time to see what’s really happening, which isn’t much. The CGI makes you wish AI had come sooner. And the editing is jerky and, frankly, a bit weird. And – while violence is expected, that’s partly why we’re here – it’s so relentlessly gory one suspects its makers simply ran out of ideas.
8. Alien vs. Predator (2004)
As a standalone concept film, it’s fine. Although it does little credit to either of the cine-mythologies it mines. Directed by Paul W.S. Anderson – best known for doing the Resident Evil series of films – it follows a wealthy explorer who uncovers an ancient Antarctic pyramid where parasitic aliens live. That’s bad. But worse, another alien lifeform with dreads and powers of invisibility has arrived on Earth to hunt them. All our puny humans can do is stand back and let the chaos unfold. It’s incredibly silly but send your disbelief to the gallows and it does become sort of fun.
7. Alien resurrection (1997)
Two hundred years after her death, Ripley is cloned aboard a military research ship – along with the alien queen inside her. Things quickly go sideways when the xenomorphs escape. It’s gory and slimy but never quite captures the tension, the dread or the claustrophobia, of the early Alien films.
6. Alien 3 (1992)
Personally, I like this one. Ripley crash-lands on a grim prison planet – a kind of Alcatraz in space – only to discover she’s brought an alien with her… and it’s hunting the unarmed inmates one by one. Plenty of schadenfreude when the Xenomorph eviscerates rapists and murderers or punches their brains out with the little head inside its mouth. It also gives us our first taste of alien mutants – in this case, dog.
5. Alien: Covenant (2017)
We’re cooking on acid now. A colony ship’s crew follows a mysterious signal to an apparently perfect planet, where they meet a familiar synthetic face – and the alien menace he’s been cultivating. On the one hand the film is staggeringly beautiful – it’s Ridley Scott again, after all. On the other, it does go – for this correspondent – a little heavy on the philosophy, digging deep into big themes like creation, free will, and the nature of good and evil. It works best when it leans into the original Alien material – slathering, insectile xenomorphs hellbent on wiping humans of the face of the universe. The ending is genuinely terrifying.
4. Prometheus (2012)
If you wanted to know where xenomorphs came from, Prometheus has the answer. Well, the beginning of the answer. Alien: Covenant rounds it off. It marked Ridley Scott’s return to the franchise after a 33-year break. A deep-space expedition in search of humanity’s creators instead finds an ancient, deadly experiment that may explain the xenomorphs’ origins. Michael Fassbender does an eerie turn as the enigmatic android whose curiosity and hidden agenda sets off a deadly chain reaction. There is a little too much “it’s-behind-you” stupidity from the humans which makes it hard to care when they mostly die gruesomely. But overall, it is a solidly good movie that raises genuinely interesting questions about creation, hubris and the cost of playing god.
3. Alien: Romulus (2024)
A group of young colonists scavenging an abandoned space station stumble into the perfect breeding ground for terror: a hive of hungry xenomorphs. Fede Alvarez (The Evil Dead, The Girl in the Spider’s Web) directs, and it’s hard not to be drawn in by the storyline about the brother and sister – he’s an android, she’s human, and she loves him. It’s a haunting exploration of what it means to be alive, to love, and to be more than the sum of your parts. It also pays successful homage to the originals, without growing tired and there’s enough chestbursting to die for. Even though, by now, you know it’s coming, it still delivers the gut-punch thrill with style and intensity.
=1. Aliens (1986)
Nope. Sorry. I can’t decide. Because this is where it comes down to taste. Aliens and Alien are interchangeable at the top of any list on the franchise, depending on your cinematic poison. Mine is horror. Aliens is an action thriller. And it is undoubtedly one of the greatest action thrillers ever made, a cake whose cherry must be Ripley’s immortal line as she clamps out of the lift in her cargo-loading exosuit, “Get away from her, you bitch!” Sigourney Weaver is phenomenal, which isn’t controversial: she was nominated for an Oscar for the role. It is arguably also one of the greatest movie sequels ever made. James Cameron’s imagining is not as scary as Scott’s original, but for what it loses in frights, it wins in might. A powerhouse of an action epic, it is intelligent without feeling preachy, nerve-shredding without being exhausting and utterly brilliant.
=1. Alien (1979)
It’s a near perfect sci-fi horror movie. I’m too young to remember the impact it had on cinemagoers in 1979, but it must’ve felt lethally new. The alien scuttling about the lab before flying through the air to clutch a human’s face like a mask; the subsequent chest-burst (clearly one of the most iconic tropes in cinema history); the slimy, banana-headed insectoid alien with a head for a tongue and acid for blood. The steel grid corridors, the pipes and steam and sliding doors that whoosh. It was a film of such claustrophobic menace and tactile realism that you could almost smell the oil, the sweat, and the fear – a nightmare rendered in steel and shadow.
This story originally appeared on Esquire UK.
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